30 Day Challenge - Day 12

Day 12: Bullet your whole day.

Man, I wish this had fallen on a day that I was teaching or something. A Saturday, though? Not much going on here. Here is my day so far:

• 540 am - Took puppies outside. Also let Lady out. Left them out there.
• 936 am - Got up to eat breakfast with family.
• 940-1045 am - Ate breakfast and chatted with family.
• 1050 am-1245 pm - Did a bit of cleaning up- and downstairs. Organized stuff mostly
• 1250-121 pm - Reading Narcissus in Chains by Laurell K. Hamilton

Everything below this line is in no particular order:

• Clean a little more
• Continue reading
• Feed all 8 dogs (4 of which are in search of a good home - the puppies can leave in two weeks)
• Make sure the dogs have water
• Straighten various rooms
• Perhaps shower (dunno 'bout this, not going anywhere and I did shower last night)
• Check email for information about subbing a 100 or more times
• Watch the marathon of "The Simpsons" with my husband (his favorite show)
• Maybe crochet some more Christmas stuff for my Advent Calendar
• Maybe write/work on my novel
• Maybe give puppies a bath

Well, that's about it. Not a whole lot going on today. I did leave off some of the various nit-picky things such as bathroom breaks, brushing teeth, brushing hair, etc. since they don't really need to be added. Fun fun.

Almost half way done with my 30 Day Challenge. Proud of myself that I've kept going even after that ridiculous break there. Oh well, at least I'm working on it!

30 Day Challenge - Day 11

Day 11: Put your iPod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.

Song 1: Beer in Mexico by Kenny Chesney
Song 2: Ava Maria by Celtic Woman
Song 3:  Sunshine on my Shoulder's by John Denver
Song 4: Animal by Neon Trees
Song 5: Hymn to the Sea by James Horner - I played this song for my aunt and uncle's wedding.
Song 6: What Kinda Gone by Chris Cagle
Song 7: The Lion Sleeps Tonight by InsideOut
Song 8: Poor, Poor, Pitiful Me by Terri Clark
Song 9: The World is Ours by David Correy
Song 10: Cowboy Casanova by Carrie Underwood

Well this was a short post. Not sure what I'm supposed to do with the songs or what they're supposed to mean. I do listen to a wide variety of music, though most of what is on my iPod/iTunes is Country.

Hmm... Feeling a bit lost of words for here. I'm sure tomorrow's prompt will be a bit more exciting. If not, I'll add something for the fun of it.

30 Day Challenge - Day 10

Day 10: Describe your first love and first kiss.

I was in First Grade and he was freakin' adorable! I, as much as a first grader can, loved him with all my heart. His name is Zack Browning, light brown hair, blue eyes, cute little freckles (I think... Long time ago, y'all!), and he was slightly taller than me.

My first kiss was by the same kid, same grade. We met under a wooden jungle gym/fort-thing and he kissed me. We'd been in Kindergarten together and now were in first grade. I think we even did the generic "Check yes if you like me" sorta note, but I couldn't tell you. I remember a lot about that, but not much about my first "relationship". But I digress; we kissed (chaste, kid kiss, like you give to you mom or dad) on the lips, I giggled and we went back to playing.

The worst part about all of that? He left a few days later, think he moved to a different school, but I never heard from him again. My tender 6 year old heart was broken. Even though he left, I never forgot about him (obviously). I often think of him and where he is now. Hope he's doing well.

30 Day Challenge - Day 9

Day 9: How you hope your future will be like. (I'm on a roll!)

I want my future to be happy, filled with laughter, love, and family. I want to be working with kids (High School preferably). I want to be with my husband and maybe a few kids. I want to be surrounded by fur-children. I want to be on a ranch, own a horse or two, and be content with my life. I want to be published, I want to have a least one book under my name (or pen name, either works for me).

There isn't a lot to this one. I don't know what else to say. I just want to be happy. I want to be surrounded by the people I love, by the people who love me, doing what I love. I don't necessarily want things in my future. Yeah, a two-story house with a ton of land would be great, but I don't need those to be happy. I'd be happy in a two bedroom house with a decent yard for at least one dog.

Kids are a touchy topic right now. We have a live-in niece (who is actually moving out) and a niece and nephew who come to visit during the summer and I love them, but, while I know it's different when they're my own, they've sort of ruined having kids of our own for us. At least for a few years until we can settle down and be comfortable with our lives.

I hope my future is happy and bright, simple as that.

30 Day Challenge - Day 8

Day 8: A moment you felt most satisfied with your life.

When I finally graduated college this year, I think that is the moment in my life I was most satisfied. I had finally gotten through six years of classes, teachers, assignments, failures, and bad French. It was over and I could now start on my second path towards becoming a teacher.

I also created my own outfit for that day too, which sounds a tad odd, I guess. I'm not the best with style and body image, so the fact that I threw together a great outfit for my graduation (though it was hidden beneath my gown) was a big moment for me. Something to look forward to when I start teaching.

I know I keep bringing the subject of me graduating up, but it really is a huge milestone in my life. It's not something I thought I was actually going to be able to achieve when I first started back in the Fall of 2008, but I did; I made it all the way through and have that degree in my hand.
Secondly, I am the first, and currently only, one in my family to have actually graduated from a college. Mom and Dad have taken college course and have some college credit (for whatever jobs they've got), but they haven't graduated. In fact, I don't think either of them went to college period. My younger brother was going to go, but then Denton (University of North Texas) screwed him over with "We don't have anywhere for the incoming freshmen to live on campus... Uh, sorry?" {So, if you're reading this and thinking about going to UNT, think real hard about it. A friend of mine went there for a YEAR'S WORTH OF CLASSES and the next Fall they couldn't find record of him attending. Yeah... Two strikes for that crap college.}

So, the most satisfying moment in my life is graduating college and getting my degree. I'm on my way to bigger and better things, y'all!

30 Day Challenge - Day 7

Day 7: Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.

I was born in 1989, so I am the year of the Snake. I don't know which site to take a gander at, so I closed my eyes and chose one. At www.allchinanet.com I found this, so I'm going to base today's response on what can be found in that link.

  

Hmm, "sexy, wise, materialistic personalities". Nope, don't agree with that. I'm not completely materialistic. Yeah, things are nice to have, but I have, on more than one occasion, said that "if it's gone, it's gone." when referring to various lost items (such as all of my stuff that was possibly lost in a storage locker due to lack of fiances to pay for it). Don't consider myself all that sexy either, but on rare occasion, I do feel sexy.
I do agree with the strengths, for the most part, though being in control isn't really my thing. I like to have control, but I don't always want it.
For weaknesses: I am not imperious, mendacious, ostentatious, or conniving. I'm not really a liar, I hate it when others do it, so I try real hard not to. I'm not lazy, so much as just exhausted all the time. I am easily overstressed (refer to anxiety and depression) and I'm not a big lender of money. Not because I'm materialistic, but rather because I've never had a lot of it and I try to save every penny that I can. Not sure I'm overly confident either...

Okay, so back to the original prompt. I only sort of agree with it. I'm probably a mix of a Snake and a Horse (since I was born in December of '89), but who knows. After all, each person is different, and everyone is special.

30 Day Challenge - Day 6

Bright and early for today! (It was 8:45 am when I started this post...)

Day 6: Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.

Hmm, this is going to be an interesting one, mainly because I'm not sure I can come up with 30. I'll try though!

1. I was born at Evans Hospital in Fort Carson, Colorado.
2. I played flute from 6th grade to my senior year.
3. I own a crochet business called Kota's Crochet Creations.
4. I graduated May 10, 2014 from Angelo State University with my BA in English.
5. I was married on May 25, 2013 to my darling husband.
6. I have three fur-"children" whom I love very much: Honey, Charlie, and Lady (all GSDs).
7. I am attending online classes this fall through Texas Teachers to get my teaching certification.
8. Born with blonde hair and blue eyes, I've mellowed out to a dirty blonde with sea-green eyes.
9. I've been working on my novel Always for Eternity for longer than I'd like to admit.
10. I want to visit Europe and even see Alaska (but not live there... Too cold).
11. I am the oldest of two kids, but the shortest in my family.
12. I have a lot of "adopted" family - several moms, dads, and plenty of siblings.
13. I can't eat a lot of food, due to a texture problem (such as lasagna, potato salad, and more).
14. I have psoriasis, but I don't care - it doesn't bother me.
15. Colorado, Wyoming, Louisiana, Washington D.C., New Mexico, Missouri, Oklahoma, Florida, and Kansas are all places I have visited, if briefly.
16. I'm a chocoholic; I constantly crave chocolate and want to eat it all.
17. I haven't really ridden a horse since my accident two summers ago (I was bucked off and twisted my knee something fierce).
18. I still watch "kid shows" like: My Little Pony, Kung Fu Panda, and various other shows (I can't think of any more right now).
19. I will never stop watching Disney, Dream Works, or Pixar movies.
20. I didn't jump on the SuperWhoLock band wagon until the shows were several seasons in. Working on watching all the seasons.
21. I love to read. In fact, I've had to up my Goodreads Challenge from 20 to 40!
22. Speaking of reading, I have a mini library of my own (which my husband is dreading having to move around).
23. I am part of the rare group that doesn't own a Smart Phone. I own several Smart Devices (iPad, iPod), but no Smart Phone.
24. I used to HATE carrying a purse around and only wanted carry a wallet. Sometime in college, I knew I had to carry a purse (plus, I can carry a book all the time with me now).
25. Coloring books are totally awesome. I still get excited about coloring.
26. I've read the Fifty Shades series and laugh when I know it's simply a Twilight fan fiction. Ain't it great?
27. I draw on occasion and have gotten relatively good, though it's more heads than anything.
28. I only like the red and green Haribo Gummy Bears. I'll eat them all, but I only really like the red and green ones.
29. I start subbing soon, hopefully, and I'll be on my way to a teacher within the next year!
30. I have sleeping problems, so most of the time (if I'm not busy), all I want to do is nap all day.

This list took me way longer than I thought it would, but I got it all done! 30 fun facts about me!

If you have any questions, or would like to know more about one of the thirty, feel free to ask. I'd love to answer your questions. :D

30 Day Challenge - Day 5

I'm such a terrible slacker and I know it. It's been nearly a month since I last wrote and that's terrible. I got back from my 3-week vacation and decided that I just didn't want to bother with it. And then that couple of days to myself turned into weeks cleaning and working on our house so that it could be rented out to a brother-in-law by next week and blah blah blah. So, we'll skip all my excuses and move on with the actual challenge for today.

Day 5: A time you thought about ending your own life.

Well, let's talk about a dark topic, shall we?

If I were to be brutally honest... Yes. Multiple times. But, I can't, or won't, take your pick, because I am a coward. I can't even bear the thought of hurting myself on purpose for any reason. It would hurt too much, I can't stand the sight of lots of blood or even talk about it sometimes.

When have I felt these moments? Well, due to my odd mix of anxiety and rare spurts of depression, only on rare occasion when I felt I've done something wrong, when my husband and in-laws fight, when I feel at my lowest (which is actually more often than I'd like to admit), etc. Hmm, maybe I shouldn't say rare occasion. I feel depressed several times a month, though I don't think about ending it unless I've gone down as far as I can go.

Besides being a coward, I don't end it because I actually have a lot I want to do with my life. I want to be an author, I want to teach and inspire kids, I want to ride horses on the beach or on our ranch property, I want to travel the world, so on and so forth. I want to do so much, so I wouldn't end it all before I could do any of those things.

Depression, anxiety, thoughts of suicide aren't things to take lightly. I know I need help and, as soon as I get on some good health insurance and can afford it, I will find a counselor and a doctor who can help me deal with my problems. Yeah, that probably means taking medication, but if it will help me look at my life a little better, than I'm all for it.
So, if someone in your life is experiencing these thoughts, listen to them. Offer help if they want it, but don't force it. Sometimes all it takes is for someone to listen. For me, that's all I need most of the time is a shoulder to cry on and pat me saying, "It'll be alright. I'm here for you."
If you, yourself, are thinking about ending it, find someone to talk to before you go. National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a good place to call or chat online. Google it, there are lots of sites that can be helpful. Heck, send me an email and I'd be glad to talk to you, so long as you keep living for something. Every life is precious.

(AFTERTHOUGHT: Robert Williams died of suicide, and I hadn't thought about it until after I finished this.)

30 Day Challenge - Day 4

Day 4: Your views on religion.

Wow... This challenge is rather controversial, ain't it? Views on all sorts of different things. Hmm, oh well. Without further ado, let's get this started.

My view on religion is sort of hard. I'm not an Atheist, but I'm not interested in religion as a whole. I believe in God, or a higher power if you like, but I hate attending services and Sunday School and partaking in communion and what-not. I find it tedious and boring, all of it. I wouldn't switch religions for the life of me, and I never force my religion down anyone's throat (be it in person by insisting I tell someone about my God or filling Facebook with religious photos saying "If you love God, share and like" or some nonsense like that). I have done it before, but have stopped since I got in college (and off MySpace).

I consider myself a Methodist, as I have been (more or less) since my family moved to Cove. (I may have been baptized Catholic, since Dad and his family are Catholic, but I can't say for sure.) I used to enjoy going to Sunday School and Youth Group, though service on Sunday was never my thing. Heck, I used to even play my flute in the Praise Band that started while I was in High School, though that excitement was short lived: it got boring real fast. Not enough of a challenge for me (since I made up my own music, where there was not sheet music for me, which changed every time we played), and regular services were dull. We had a preacher for 13 years and his sermons were always the same every year, without change. Ugh.

Let's get back on topic, shall we? My view on religion. I have no real love for it, at least not now. I may hop back on the "bandwagon" when we have kids, but right now I find it boring. Though, just because I'm not fond of it, doesn't mean I think it should be shoved down the throats of others (no matter what your religion is) nor do I think it should be taken away from those who want to practice it. Hell, if children in school want to pray or create a group and use the school as a meeting place, then let them. Only worry about it if they're trying to shove it down people's throats and force it upon others. Or if it's harmful to the others in a way that is physical.

Ugh, I can't even... Look, I'll keep it simple. You have your religion (or lack-there-of) and I have mine. If you want a friendly talk about it, sure I'll jump in. If you're going to be rude about it and try and shove it down my throat or tell me that my religion is "wrong," then just go away. I don't want to hear it. We all have our own religion and I don't need yours shoved in places it doesn't need to be.

30 Day Challenge - Day 3

Day 3: Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Hmm, that's quite a question there. I'm going to split these up, since I don't think they should just be bundled together as one topic.

DRUGS: Unless they're prescription, don't do them. Over the counter stuff for colds, allergies, common stuff, etc., fine. I suppose that's okay. If they're illegal or you know that you're probably not supposed to be doing them, DON'T. Marijuana? Ugh, there are so many things wrong with this product. A handful of States have legalized it, so if you want to do it, do it there. Sure, Congress could legalize it through out the entire United States, tax the hell out of it, and we'd get rid of some of that debt. I don't do drugs; hell, I don't even smoke. The smoke from cigarettes makes me sick to my stomach, and mother is allergic to it so there is a good possibility that I could be as well. (Thank god my husband doesn't smoke. He quit years before we got together and only smokes cigars when he's stressed and far away from me.) If you want to get high, there are safer ways to do it. Probably cheaper too, but I can't confirm that.

ALCOHOL: This one's a bit muddier. I like to drink, on occasion, but never enough to get myself drunk, shitfaced, or to the point of blacking out. I have also never drank so much alcohol that I have even been considered "drunk". Mostly because I don't drink much. But if you're known to drink and get stupid drunk or are an alcoholic, then that seems simple. You don't get any. It's fine in moderation, but as soon as it gets out of hand, it's stupid and the drinker needs to be cut off. And drinking and driving, no. Too many people get killed or hurt because someone drank too much.
I also think that mixing your drinks with caffeine isn't a good ideal, nor doing drugs while drinking (prescription or otherwise). Alcohol is crap for your body, don't make it worse by trying to add drugs on top of that. You may not feel the effects of what's going on, but you will when you're sober.

Ugh... I look at this reply/thought topic and frown at it. I don't like it in the least but, my brain won't let me find the words that I really should use, the words I probably should say.
This isn't an invitation for you to start yelling at me or debating with me about my ideal of politics because well, I'm not entirely too sure where I stand on the current issues lately due to travel and school and various other things. If you have a comment, and can say it without sounding rude, feel free to chat with me about it.

30-Day Challenge - Day 2

Challenge for Day 2: Where would you like to be in 10 years?

Honestly, I haven't even thought about it. I rarely think about what I'm going to be doing in 1 year, let alone 10. Things like that cause my anxiety to spike and the depression hits when I don't realize my goals and blah, blah, blah. So, I try and take things one day at a time so that I can keep myself whole and healthy. But, I do have goals, so this really isn't a stretch.

But, since I'm taking this challenge, I'll give it a try. In 10 years, I'd like to have most (if not all) of my student debt paid off, working at a school where I'll be teaching English (maybe AP if I'm lucky), living in a house we own with my husband, maybe a kid or two (though, maybe just one), playing with my fur-children, and crocheting like a mad woman.

If you haven't watched Randy Pausch's The Last Lecture or haven't read his book (they're about the same, though both good to have), then I urge you to do so. I have read the book many times and watch the video over and over again. I have an entire list of things of things I want to do. I used to have them written down (and still might, just need to find them), and I will eventually get around to them. I want to travel to Europe, live a two story house with a huge yard (which is sorta true as of right now, though it's not ours), own a horse and ride every day, and so much more. I don't think I'll get around to doing those things in 10 years, but that's cool. I don't care when they happen, I just want them to come true one day.

Tomorrow's challenge might be a little hard to complete because I'm headed off to the Ft. Worth Zoo with my nieces and nephew, my Aunt-and-Uncle-in-law and their son, my sister-in-law, and my darling husband. It should be fun, even if we're leaving at 6 in the morning. Woo!

30-Day Challenge - Day 1

So, I been browsing Pinterest and Google for something to use this blog for, and I've run across this several times. So, I figured, ah what the hell, why not?

So, today is Day 1 of my 30 Day Challenge.
My current relationship is married. I've been married for a year and two (almost two) months to my darling husband, Austin Raymond Thorpe, also known as Jimmy. I adore this man, even if he does upset me from time to time (he's a guy and a husband, so it's bound to happen. No worries, though, I still love him).
Gah... I'll keep working on this as the challenge goes by, work my word magic as I continue and think of more to write about.

30 Day prompt, going to finish it all!

I'm  going to try and keep up with this as much as I can. Even if I don't keep up with it for 30 days in a row, I'll keep going with it, just so I can say I did it. It keeps me and my mind busy, and I love writing. That and it will give this blog a purpose of sorts until I can figure out what exactly I'm doing with this thing. Maybe that's it, I'll just get prompts and write every day that I can and make a schedule for a couple times a week. It'll help me pull out the writer in myself. Awesome. :D
Though, sadly, I'll miss several days on the 14th-17th, due to a trip to Houston for vacation, and then a few weeks from the 22nd to... Well, I don't know when we're getting back and my Blogger app isn't the greatest, but I'll definitely try.

Down, but not out

A while back, I posted that I was taking an exam in Del Rio: The English Language Arts and Reading 7-12 TEXES exam. Remember this little rant? Yeah, that mess of a trip.

Well, I got my results back today, in little less than a month. Awesome, right? Well, I'm glad the results got here within a month, but the actual results themselves? Yeah, those are less than satisfying. I needed 240 points for a passing exam score and I, sadly, only made 231.

"Oh, but Julie, that's not so bad. 9 points away, that's good." Yeah, yeah... It's good alright, but that's not what I was expecting at all. My heart fell to through my chest and I spent the better part of an hour crying. I was crying over a stupid test. Ugh, seriously, this depression and anxiety shit can be a real bother. So much so that right now, I can't even talk about the exam without tearing up. Hell, I can't even think about it too much with wanting to break down and cry like my six year old niece does when she's having a tantrum. But I'm better than that, so I try and shove it all away, you know, to be strong and I tell myself that I can take it again in September.

So, another trip to Del Rio (we have a full sized spare for the Mazda, so no worries there), but we're going to make sure there's a jack in the vehicle. Whatever, I'll manage, right?

Well, I might not if I hadn't made a board on Pinterest called "Needing A Little Pick-Me-Up". It's a fantastic board for me to glance at if I'm feeling down about something (such as this exam), or if my anxiety and depression are attempting to get the better of me. It's full of little pictures and sayings that inspire uplifting and happy thoughts.

For example, the one thing I have going through my mind right now is from my beloved board: "Failure is a bruise, not a tattoo." - Jon Sinclair. It's been mighty helpful so far, and it'll probably be my motto for the next day or so while I take time to accept my scores and seek help applying for my online classes. I'll probably sub this coming school year, while I attempt to study and gather my wits, so that I can study and make a bit of money on the side, since my crochething business isn't moving very fast. (Feel free to check that out, by the way.) I may make a few things in Paint Rock colors and see if anyone wants to buy them. (Maroon and white, Indians)

Thanks for dropping by and reading. :D

Goodness Me

So, I took an exam on the 13th of June in Del Rio (for my Alternative Certification online). Sadly, this was the closest test center to the little town of Paint Rock, Tx. Oh well, no biggie. We'll take the 3-4 hour trip to Del Rio; we being my husband and I. We had a small mishap on the way, towards the beginning, on which direction we were supposed to take (we both blame my Father-in-Law on that part, because he forgot to direct us toward the correct route before we left).
The trip there was fantasticly entertaining. We laughed and joked the whole way there, especially through Leakey, which we thought would be a terrible place to live with a name like that. And we wondered how the town got that name. (Apparently it was named in honor of John Leakey. Well, alrighty then) Also, Real County was hilarious, just because of the name as well. (Which is also named after a guy with the last name: Julius Real.)
We arrived in Del Rio an hour ahead of schedule, which was fantastic for us. We explored the town for a tiny bit before I went back and took my test. I had 5 hours to take it, and I completed all 104 questions (100 were multiple choice, 4 were written answer) in about 2.5 hours. I feel rather good about it all; however, I won't know about my results until July 7th. Such a long time to wait! Oh well, no biggie.
Oh, we even got to go through a Border Patrol station on the way back. We thought it was going to be harder than it was. They simply asked if we were American Citizens and waved us through. They had a beautiful Black German Shepherd there. Pretty pup!
Well, that's were all the fun pretty much stops. We gassed up and were on the other side of Uvalde, closer to Concan, when we got a flat. We figured we could get to the next gas station on it, no biggie. Well... That's not true. We got a true flat that lead us to pulling over on the side of the road. Okay, no worries. We got this. Pulled out the doughnut and panicked a bit. There was no jack and there was no cell service. Great... It took us 30+ minutes to flag someone down. Finally, an older couple pulled over and a gentleman about our age turned around and stopped, both giving us assistance. The older couple let us borrow their jack and the guy let us borrow his lug wrench. Okay, fantastic. Now we have to figure out what to do on this doughnut, which isn't supposed to get us very far or anywhere very fast.
It's almost 9 pm and we've barely made it the edge of Concan. Breathe and use the GPS to find and call repair shops. Everything in Leakey is closed and everyone we called in Uvalde blew us off. Called one place who gave us a number for another place who just basically said a nice big "F-YOU". Well, okay, fine. We'll call the parents, and ask them what we should do. They tell us to get a room for the night and find a mechanic in the morning. Got it; we're headed to Leakey for the night then.
So, Leakey... Funny town before, pain in our butts now. Of the two inns/motels/whatever you wanna call 'em, both are full. There is 400+ people in this town due to the beginning of summer and there is no place for us to stay. FANTASTIC! It's almost 11 pm and we're exhausted and hungry and tired of being in the car. But we can't stay here, so we decide to push our luck on the doughnut and head to Junction, 60 miles from Leakey.
Do you know how slow 25 miles per hour is at night on a road that is supposed to be 70-75? Other vehicles passed us and it was like they were going the speed of light! Ugh... The GPS is trying to tell us that our destination (a Days Inn on the outskirts of Junction, where we hope to spend the night) is only 30 minutes away. Oh, silly GPS, don't you know we can't go that fast?
25 mph and 2 hours later, we finally arrive at the Days Inn at 1 in the morning and we're more than exhausted and starving, yet not hungry at all. We paid $100+ to sleep about 7 hours. Whatever, I don't really care (Father-in-Law had graciously given us his card in order to fill up with gas, so we used that to pay for everything we need. Thank the Lord that we had that card, or else we would have slept in the car), we're tired and we need sleep. We've been up since 7 am to make sure we arrived on time with meal times and gas stops and all that. Tired, bed time.
8 am the morning of the 14th, we puttered 3 miles down to an auto shop (which, apparently, was open 24/7, but we didn't know that, but neither did the guy at the desk who directed us there. No biggie.). We got the tired fixed and he even aired up the doughnut for us, letting us grab breakfast and drive the hour home. So freakin' tired, we took naps that day and went to bed early even.

So, the moral of all that, I suppose, is make sure you're well equipped to take extended journeys (such as making sure you have everything you need for a flat) and that I don't want to make any more journeys this month. Oh brother, I am so tired of sitting in a car for long periods of time.
Off to crochet my butt off now. If you're interested in checking all that out, check out Kota's Crochet Creations for more information. I have lots of stuff posted there!

GRADUATE!

It's official! I'm am a graduate of Angelo State University! All decked out in my black cap and gown with my blue and gold tassel! (Feels vaguely familiar, though high school was blue cap and gown with blue and gold tassel. But that's what I get for going to a school with the same colors as my high school. Kinda cool though. Maybe I can teach at a school with the same colors too! Though, that might be a bit much.)

I won't get my diploma for a while (two weeks), but I did get a coupon to the bookstore at the school and I am now part of ASU Alumni for a year (free of charge) and I even got a nifty coin! Pretty cool stuff, right?

Soon, I'll be off on another adventure. I'll be going through the "Texas Teachers: Alternative Certification", which is an online course that I'll take for a bit, then I'll get my own classroom for a year (probationary license), but after that year I will be a full fledged teacher! During the probationary year, I will get all the benefits of a fully licensed teacher: health care, full pay, etc. It's exciting! I can't wait to start my next set of classes to get my own classroom!

My husband is also on his way to graduating. He's got a week left, but then he will also be a graduate, though not from ASU. (I'm not sure if I explained that he's going through a Police Academy in San Angelo, but not the SAPD academy.) He's excited, but nervous, since they're still doing a lot of in class testing before the State Exam. I have faith in him though, he can totally do it!

Once he graduates, we'll be off to our own place and our jobs. Don't know where we're headed yet, since hubby has to make calls and do interviews before we can actually move. In-laws are wonderful, though. They're holding back a portion of their tax return for us, offering to help us get a place wherever we wind up, be it near-by or in another town in Texas. Of course, there will be lots of pictures and a blog about it, so check that out when we move. I'll be sure to let ya know.

Things in which I am Confident in

I keep seeing Psoriasis commercials on T.V. and honestly, it bothers the hell out of me. They depict ADULTS in their 40-50's with this issue. Seriously? You, as a 40-something year old, are concerned about having to explain your Psoriasis to "another stylist" or hiding it from your friends/family or worried that it'll drive your customers away? (Though, I am sorta glad to know that I'm not the only one out there with this stupid disease, even if I techincally knew that I wasn't the only one. And I'm glad that there is a "cure" for it, even if I never actually use it.) Okay, first of, you're older and the people you freakin' hang with probably already know that you have Psoriasis and aren't bothered by it (or not nearly as bothered by as they were/as you are). Secondly, try having Psoriasis at the age of TEN YEARS OLD and trying to explain it to your friends, especially since I didn't know what the hell it was myself. A rash. A non-contagious rash. Yeah, that's helpful. Thirdly, I went to my senior Band Banquet ("prom" for band kids with awards and stuff), LOOKING LIKE A FREAKIN' LEPER! I literally had little spots all over my body from head to toe. It looked like I had chicken pox, except in "rash" form. It was ridiculous. But you wanna know what? I didn't care. My friends didn't care. My teachers didn't care. My boyfriend (at the time) didn't care. Why? Because it didn't bother me. I was 18 years old then, and I had had the stupid thing for almost 10 years. You can either freak out because people freak out, or learn to love your "spots". Hell, I know I do. I still have rough patches on various part of my body, but they don't bother me. If people ask, I tell them that it's Psoriasis, which is basically a non-contagious rash, that I've had since I was 10. Yeah, I'll probably have to explain it to my students, my children/grandchildren/etc., or whoever else sees it and "freaks out". Doesn't bother me in the least. Sure, it'd be nice if I didn't have to worry about exploding in spots from my head to my toe at random times in my life, but of all the things I'm worried about in my appearance: my Psoriasis is the least of my problems.
TL;DR: I hate Psoriasis commercials cuz they're full of older people who should be used to that kind of mess by now. I've had it since I was 10 yrs old, and I am not ashamed of it; one of the few things I am not ashamed about where my body image is concerned.

Huh, well, that was a fun rant. Yeah, that was a block of text. Normally I split it up a little better than that, but I just couldn't do it today. I am just so bothered by those commercials. They're ridiculous, or they are to me at least. I wonder how other people look at them...

Well, that's more or less all I have to say for now. I'm off to write on Kota's Crochet Creations (another blog I have on Blogger), since I finished an order. Chat with y'all later.

Been A While

It's been a while since March, right? It's almost May, in fact. Had no inspiration to write, or complain, hence the month long break. So, what's been up with me? Well, just a handful of things.

My niece, Kaylee, has taken quite a shine to me. All I did was help her with her homework the 24th, and from that point on she has decided that I was going to help her with all her homework. (She's working on sentences, so it's not too difficult.) She even listens to me a bit more than her grandparents (and I'm sure a whole hell of a lot more than her mother/father/mother's "boyfriend"/etc). The other day she handed me five pennies and told me it was for gas money in case our truck ran out of gas. She even told me today that I was her favorite (not sure "what", but still cute) and brought me a picture that she drew at school. And she has come and given me a hug and kiss every night before bed this week. She really is a cute kid when she's not being a terror.

Speaking of terrors, my sister-in-law (niece's mother) really grates my nerves and I often laugh at her misfortunes. Yeah, I'm going to hell for that, but I don't laugh in her face and I actually avoid confronting her (since she believes she can walk into her parents house without warning and whenever she wants like she owns the place). But she has stolen from her family and me (even before I was married in), so I feel no pity for messing up constantly. She hasn't figured out her life yet and she's older than I am. She's also in the house that my husband and I were supposed to move into once we graduated. No one was happy about that mess, but there she is. Meh, enough about her.

I graduate in ten days! I'll finally be out of Angelo State University and on to Texas Teachers for my alternative certificate. I'm super excited to be done with school and on my way to becoming a teacher. I'll only have a little bit of schooling left before I start my probationary teaching (full benefits and pay) for a year. After that, I'll be an official teacher and can teach anywhere in the state of Texas. My husband is almost finished with his schooling at the Police Academy in town, just 6 days after I graduate, and will be a police officer anywhere he'd like. We've talked about moving, but right now, it's just in the state of Texas, due to my degree-less-ness. But once that's finished, I can take whatever exam needed and can teach anywhere in the States. How exciting is that?

The horses, all but my SiL's, have gone away to another home. Their owner's sister (or whomever) took them last week, so no more ponies to ride or rebreak. I'm a little depressed about that, but ya know, stuff happens. We're not messing with the other horse out there unless we buy it, since it's not ours and she lives in town (she'd give us grief, even if we did purchase the horse from her parents, my in-laws). But, good news, they're building a Dog Park in San Angelo, so (should we stay in the area or even move back if we leave) the dogs will get some social interaction with other dogs and plenty of exercise. I can't wait!

Hmm... Other than all that, I can't think of too much to say. If you're interested in learning anything about me, let me know in the comments below. I'd love to chat or create a blog specifically to any one who'd like me to talk about something specific.

Don't forget to check out kotascrochetcreations.blogspot.com for all the crochet creations that I've created! They're pretty amazing! 

Reading Books and Working with Horses

I'll start with yesterday, the 27th. I started, and finished, the book "Divergent" by Veronica Roth. If you haven't read it, then go do so. I have not read an entire book in a single day in I don't know how long, but this is a book I wholly gobbled up. I'm so excited that I can't wait to get my hands on the next two books, even if the reviews for the final one aren't all that great. You know what, it's a book. Sometimes, by the third book (or later books, such as J.K.'s books), authors feel so pressured to make it perfect and find a suitable ending to wrap it all up without setting forth the ideal for a fourth book. (Unlike, J.K. who set it up for a whole new series... Ugh, seriously? I would have been happy with the ending and no epilogue.)

You want to talk about a series that just goes nowhere and feels like poo? Try reading the "Kushiel's Legacy" series by Jacqueline Carey. They're large books with relatively small print and up to 900+ pages in each book. Emotionally and physically draining, and that's just the first three. There's a second set with the same time line, though from another character's point of view. I really don't think I'm going to get to them. It's an interesting series, "Kushiel's Legacy", but you have to be ready to read and read and read.

Have any questions on what books to read? I can give you friendly advice based on what I've read. Want to know what I've read? Check out my Goodreads profile. I have a ton of books there, and that's not even the full list. I currently have 168 on that list and it grows every passing month. I even have a goal to read 20 books this year. I read 15 last year (just barely!), and thought I'd up my goal for this year. I even include the books that I have to read for class, since I do have to read them. Feel free to ask away!

Today, hubby and I went out and worked with the horses my in-laws have on their property. They're "ride-able," but probably not safe to ride. So, we're starting with groundwork for a while. Fun stuff and all, but it definitely wears you out fast. Especially when the horses just don't want to behave. It's also hard to focus on the massive beast when 4 dogs have decided that they 1) want to play with you/want your attention, 2) want to play with the giant beasts on the other side of the fence. The gelding that's out there is a total arse, but that didn't stop my husband from headbutting him or the mare we worked with. Pretty sure he's got a headache from all that mess. (He is passed out right now, sleeping off all his hard work. I feel like I barely did anything... At least I tried, since I've never "broken" a horse before.) Huh, should clarify real quick. They're already broken, but it's been a while since they've been ridden (since the original owner of the gelding got thrown almost as soon as he was on), so we're "re-breaking" them so they can be sold to people who want to ride them.

It's been two years since I've even really been around a horse, so today was fantastic for me. I was bucked off the last horse I was on (more like half-bucked and half-jumped/pushed myself off the horse), and had to get my right leg checked out because I landed hard on it and my back. I was totally fine, just twisted and tore a few things, which means more knee problems that I will have in the future. I learned from a young age that instead of falling off and possibly getting even more hurt, it's best to "push" yourself away from the horse. Yeah, there's still pain, but you're getting yourself away from the horse and there is probably going to be less damage than if you had stayed on. (I did the same thing on a golf cart three years ago... Totally different story there.) I honestly have missed the connection with horses that I used to get every summer working at a Girl Scout camp in Colorado, so today was fantastic.

I'm a Terrible Aunt... Maybe not.

Okay, despite what I said in my previous post, I really do adore (on occasion when she's not a total twerp, like kids are) my niece.

She is quite the handful, my niece, and can throw the worst tantrums of any kid that I know. And she lies so much that she probably thinks the world revolves around her. Ugh, more than a handful sometimes, I'll admit it. (And I stand by the fact that her parents really need to spend more time actually parenting their child, whether or not they're actually together.)

Today, my niece was up in her room with the door closed. It's rare for her to be up there, let alone with the door closed. She's only 6, and something like that sets off warning flags in my head. I open up and yup, there she is, sitting in her chair and holding a bag of gummies that I know she's not supposed to have. I question her, not really interested in punishing her, mostly just want to find out what she's doing upstairs with candy I know she's not supposed to have. So I send her downstairs and to have a chat with her grandparents. I was correct in my assumptions that nope, she's not supposed to be eating that candy. She was given the option of time-out or a spanking for lying to me.

Well, that's what started a 45 (plus or minus a handful of minutes) minute tantrum and screaming this house probably hasn't heard in quite some time. She refused to accept time-out or a spanking for lying to me, and eventually got both (several spankings included, one from me and two or three more from grandpa). The name calling and "I don't have to listen to you" and "I hate you" cries ran on for a while. That was accompanied by thrashing, kicking her seat and anything she could reach, and banging her head against the wall as loud as she could. All we asked her to do while she sat in time-out quietly, which she claimed she couldn't do at the top of her lungs. Oh, and she only wanted to be alone, but wouldn't sit still in her chair where we would leave her alone to sit in time-out.

I simply laughed in another room because I had been like that at one time. I cried until I wore myself out and eventually stopped crying and making noise to serve my time-out. I know what it's like to be in that position. Of course, I usually got a spanking and sent to my room where I screamed and cried until I was ready to apologize.

Once she was done with the tears and the hollering, she apologized to everyone in the house and hugged everyone and all was well again. The time-out/crying spells are semi-regular when she's around, so it's nothing really new. The only difference tonight was that I was the first one to discipline her, which was probably a huge surprise/scare to her since I have only "laid" a hand on her to pick her up and put her back in her time-out chair for my mother-in-law. I've always been the "nice" aunt, the one who tried to calm her down, cheer her up, etc.

Ah, it was an eventful day. Look at me, writing three days in a row. Ha, that's amazing. Probably won't happen too often. Although, I do find this sort of fun. Maybe I'll keep it up. :D

I Try So Hard

I love my husband to death, I really do, but sometimes he can really make me feel sick to my stomach and want to do terrible things to myself. No, I'm not suicidal; as I explained to him, I'm far too much of a coward actually do anything. That and I'm sort of paranoid of various sharp items and blah blah blah. Basically, I wouldn't cause self harm because I'm unable to do that. (That and blood makes me sick to my stomach, and I either pale so bad that I have to walk away from blood/bloody topic/etc. or I pass out.)

So, that's my issue today. I feel utterly sick to my stomach all because of a particular topic we chatted about. I don't want to go into depth about it because I'm not entirely sure who does or doesn't read this. Yeah, I know, I'm being utterly vague for a blog that's about whatever I want, but I don't need this to work it's way to someone who will spazz out and ruin things for me.

Oh, and our "lovely" niece is back at the house with us. Spoiled rotten and throws fake tantrums just to get a rise/attention out of her grandfather and grandmother. She simply bothers my husband and I because no one will swat her butt when she needs it. Time out doesn't work for her, trust me, they've tried. The real fun thing about all this? Her gorram mother moved into the house that was supposed to be our after graduation, which is another story entirely, but has barely taken care of her six year old daughter. Hell, far as I know, this woman has rarely been in her daughters life more than she has to be. Our niece has been with her father (who doesn't do much on the side of child rearing either, but he's better than mom), or with her grandparents. And that's all I know for the last three years now. What in the world is wrong with this family? No ideal, but I know that I don't want my in-laws to do too much with our children when we have them. They've had several children, but it feels (mostly to me, and this is just my opinion) that they really don't know how to raise a child any more.

Good thing that happened today? I got to help my husband change the oil on our truck. Though, mostly I was the run-around gal. I did do him (and me, I suppose) a favor while he changed the oil, I cleaned almost all of the windows on the little Ranger. The only one I couldn't really get to was the back window on the outside because of the lovely headache rack that we have. Should go run it through a car wash, but since the door is a little wonky and doesn't seal properly. (This is what happens when I leave him alone with a friend of ours to fix the truck. It's okay, I still love him.)

Bleh, enough for now, I suppose. Don't want to bog y'all down with too much mess at first. There's probably plenty more of that to come.

Fresh Start

So, as the description says, this is pretty much an "anything goes" blog. Probably one where I just write to write and rant when I have nothing better do. Like now. Because that's how life is. One big boring thing right after the other.

Don't know what I'll post exactly, but it'll be pretty much whatever makes me happy for the day. Be it a short story I wrote, or perhaps a poem I'd like y'all to read. I'll probably blog about my life and the "horrors" that I have to deal with. (These "horrors" probably being nothing more than a 24 yr old whining about her life and school. I need to get it out somewhere, so here it is for now.) I'll try not to bother you too much about it all, though. My life isn't all that interesting sometimes.

I don't expect much in the way of feedback, since most of my audiences have almost always been silent. Which is nice and all, though I do miss the interaction and discussion. But if you ever so desire to write something, then feel free and I'll most definitely respond to you as quickly as I can.

Oh, and of course: I have a terrible time remembering to update, so you may not see anything from me for a while, but no worries. I'm still alive and well. Well, I'll be alive any way! :) If not, I give permission to whomever finds this blog after I die to write whatever your heart desires. Or something like that.

Until next time, my dears.